


Bei Müllers hat's Gebrannt

by Multishipperlove



Series: Zemnian Roots [4]
Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Child games, Gen, Original Character(s), family abduction, goblins mentioned, more focused on Caleb and Nott and the oc, nothing explicit though, zemnian
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-11
Updated: 2020-01-11
Packaged: 2021-02-27 08:33:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,641
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22204150
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Multishipperlove/pseuds/Multishipperlove
Summary: The Mighty Nein find a little girl hiding in a closet in a ransacked home. Only problem is that she only speaks Zeminan, which means that Caleb has to find a way to entertain her while the others look for her family.
Series: Zemnian Roots [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1488566
Comments: 8
Kudos: 116





	Bei Müllers hat's Gebrannt

**Author's Note:**

> There's actually some German dialogue in this one, I do hope it still makes sense to everyone though. If not, please let me know and I'll post a translation for those lines as well, and not just for the game they play.  
> Other than that, please enjoy and let me know what you think!

On days like these, Caleb really wished for their moorbounders to return. They had been on the road for hours, since the early morning, and the horses they had rented were just so much slower. It was still better than walking, especially in the heat, but it wasn't like the weather didn't affect the horses as well.

To make his day even worse, they were travelling on the outskirts of the Zemni Fields, had been for a while for their mission, and even though they were nowhere near the place where he grew up, it was putting him on edge. So far they had barely run into any other people though, and most of the few who did cross their path were travellers as well.

A voice from the front of their little troop brought him back to the moment, and not surprisingly, it was Jester who disturbed the weary silence they'd been riding in for the last half an hour or so. “Look Fjord, there's a farm ahead! Maybe they'll let us spend the night there, that would be a lot better than sleeping in the hut again.”

Fjord, who looked about as mentally present as Caleb had been, startled slightly, sending his horse involuntarily to the left. Getting back to his former position he looked ahead, finally noticing the old farmhouse as well. “Oh, yeah, sure. We could ask, at least.” Turning his head, he looked to everyone else in the group. “What do you guys think, should we stop for the night already?”

“Sure, why not,” Caduceus chimed in. “If not for the seven of us, at least the horses deserve a good night's rest.”

The rest of them mostly shrugged in answer or gave half hearted murmurs of agreement, which was apparently good enough for Jester. With some newfound vigor they all picked up their speed again, and the farm that had only been a little spot at the horizon so far quickly came closer.

When they finally reached it, Fjord was the first one off his horse. “Alright, I'm gonna ask if they got space for us and the horses, anyone wanna come?”

“Take Caleb with you, just in case they don't speak Common,” Beau told them, getting off as well before helping Jester (who didn't actually need help, but definitely seemed to appreciate it anyway).

“Good point,” Fjord agreed, stopping again to wait for Caleb now.

The wizard gave a soft sigh but nodded. “I, ah, alright. Sure. I guess I can come. But just so you know, it is improbable that the people here only speak Zemnian.”

“Still, can't hurt to have a local with me,” Fjord told him with a grin, and then lead the way to what looked to be the front door.

Only as they stepped closer did they realise that the door wasn't closed. It stood slightly ajar, not far enough for either of them to look inside yet though. Fjord frowned and looked back to Caleb, who placed a hand on his component pouch and gave a slight nod.

“Yeah, I thought it was a bit quiet,” Fjord muttered, taking another step closer and pushing the door open completely. “Hello?” he called out. “Anyone in here?”

When even waiting several seconds didn't reward them with a reply, they walked in. And the sight that greeted them wasn't pretty.

The door lead into a small hallway, but from their current position they could already see into the next two rooms, one a kitchen with a dining area, a big table that would easily seat more than the seven of them, and the other something more akin to a living room. Both rooms were completely ransacked.

Chairs were pushed over, every cabinet door opened, every shelf empty. The ground was littered with broken glass and porcelain, and what looked to be food stains everywhere.

They both started to move through the mess slowly, not sure if whoever had done this was still around. But really, they hadn't been quiet in their arrival. Caleb was pretty sure that, if anything wanted to attack them, it would have done so by now.

Fjord stopped by a red stain near the living room door, and it didn't take him long to confirm what Caleb had feared. “It's blood,” the half-orc told him. “It's not even completely dry yet... whatever happened, it happened recently.”

“We should get the others,” Caleb suggested. “Maybe we can find out more. And I don't think the attackers are still around, but still... safety in numbers, and all that.”

“You're not wrong,” Fjord agreed with a sigh. “Alright, let's go. I would like to help these people, if we still stand a chance.”

A few minutes later they had told the rest of the group what was going on, and were now split up throughout the house to look for anything useful. Beau and Nott hadn't been stoked about the idea of trying to help, arguing that they didn't even know if there was anyone left they could help, but they'd all known that their protest was token at best.

Caleb was looking for any magical means of destruction downstairs, when two screams suddenly rang from the room directly above him. One of them sounded suspiciously like Nott, and he immediately turned and ran up the stairs, hearing the others who had been downstairs with him right behind.

“Nott!” He pushed into the room first, seeing her frozen in front of a closet, both hands holding the door shut. “Nott, what's going on?” he asked, seeing how pale she suddenly looked and now also hearing the muffled screaming and crying that came from inside the closet.

“What's in there?” Beau asked, her voice already sounding slightly horrified as she stepped up behind Caleb. In the corner of his eye, he could see Yasha gripping her sword.

“A kid,” Nott finally answered, ears drooping and folding close to her head.

“A kid?! Then why the hell are you keeping her in there?” Fjord asked.

“Because she saw me and immediately started screaming! I don't think she's going to be very fond of this!” Nott hissed back, and gesturing to the entirety of her face as she did so. “Give me a moment.”

As the others watched, she took a second to cast alter self and turn herself into Veth. The crooked sharp teeth disappeared, along with the glowing yellow eyes and the green skin. In it's place once more stood a little halfling lady, features round and inviting and definitely a lot less threatening.

Once the disguise was complete, Nott carefully opened the closet door again. The crying didn't stop, and beside a mop of blonde hair they couldn't see anything yet with her standing in the way.

“Hey, hey there. It's okay, the, uh, the evil goblin is gone. Come on now, you're okay,” she told the child, in an attempt to calm her down. It didn't seem to work very well though, and Nott turned back to them with a bit of desperation on her face.

“I, uh, maybe one of you guys should go,” Fjord mumbled, giving the two humans of the party a pointed look. And while Caleb still hesitated, Beau nodded briefly and stepped forward, kneeling down beside Nott to be more on eye level with the child.

The appearance of a second person seemed to give her pause, at least, and Beau gave the kid her best version of a friendly smile. Which, surprisingly, was a lot friendlier than what she usually managed. “Hey. My friend is right, you know, you can come out now. You're safe. Don't you want to come out of that stupid closet?”

The girl just stared at her for a moment, with her lower lip still trembling. “Wo ist meine Mama?” she finally whispered, causing Beau to freeze this time. She had a vague idea of what the kid had just asked for, but that was definitely not Common what she had just heard.

“Caleb?” She looked over her shoulder, motioning for the wizard to come over. “Hey, Caleb, I think we need a translator after all.”

He frowned but didn't hesitate, quickly stepping closer to them, just as Nott got out of the way to let the two humans handle it. Along with Beau he kneeled down in front of the girl, taking in the terrified face and her torn clothing, the tussled hair. “Hey... kannst du mich verstehen?” he asked gently.

She nodded, slowly, as if she still didn't trust either of them. Which was very fair, Caleb wouldn't have expected her to trust them.

“Okay, das ist gut. Oder? Es ist viel besser wenn man sich verstehen kann,” Caleb continued, trying not to get into too much of a nervous ramble now that he felt solely responsible for somehow communicating with this child. “Bist du verletzt? Kannst du uns sagen was passiert ist, oder- oder vielleicht wie du heißt?”

“Mein Name ist Anna,” came the quiet reply.

“Und wie alt bist du?”

“Fünf.”

“Fünf? Das- ah, das ist ein gutes Alter. Willst du nicht rauskommen?” He offered her a hand, and after another moment of hesitation she took it and finally got up. She was still careful, and pressed closer to him immediately, holding on to his coat with a free hand.

Caleb cleared his throat and turned back to his companions, forcing a smile on his face. “Everyone, this is Anna, and she is five years old.”

“Has she told you what happened yet?” Fjord asked, and Caleb could feel the girl trying even harder to disappear into him.

“Ah, no. We didn't get that far yet.” He looked down to her, gently squeezing her hand once. “Das is Fjord. Ich weiß er sieht etwas... gefährlich aus. Aber er ist wirklich nett, versprochen.”

She nodded again but didn't move from her spot, watching them all with a wary eye. Caduceus spoke up next, and even though Anna jumped slightly at the deep voice, she seemed to find him less scary than Fjord. If the pressure she subjected Caleb's hand to was anything to go by.

“Maybe we should have this conversation somewhere else, bring her somewhere she feels more comfortable,” the firbolg suggested.

“What, like the rest of her house, which is equally in shambles?” Beau asked.

“Don't say it like that, you're only going to scare her,” Nott hissed, glaring at her friend now.

“It's not like she understands me in the first place.”

“We don't know that, she could understand more than we think, while just not being able to speak the language herself. For now, it's better to speak with some caution,” Caleb replied, getting involved again before the two could start arguing. “Maybe we just take her outside for now.”

The others agreed with that. So after making sure she would be okay with it, Caleb picked the girl up and carried her outside to where their horses were still waiting. He made sure that she could lean her head against his shoulder, trying to shield her from as much of the chaos as possible. Especially the blood.

Once outside, he put her back on her feet, but she still refused to let go of his coat for too long. “Kannst du uns jetzt sagen was passiert ist? Hast du irgendwas gesehen?” Caleb asked again, doing his best to ignore his friend's imploring looks. “Hast du dich selbst im Schrank versteckt?”

Only at the last question did she finally react and shake her head. “Nein. Mama hat uns gesagt wir sollen nach oben laufen, und Gregor hat dann gesagt ich soll in den Schrank gehen und ganz leise sein, bis sie wieder weg sind.”

“Wer ist 'sie'?”

“Die Goblins.”

That word made all of them perk up again, especially Nott. The difference in pronunciation was after all minimal enough that they still knew which creatures she was talking about.

Caleb nodded grimly. “Kannst du mir mehr erzählen? Egal was, alles könnte hilfreich sein.”

They talked for another minute or two, before he finally got up again and turned back to the group. “She says their family was attacked by goblins. They didn't see them coming, and by the time her mother realized what was happening, all she could do was try and send her children somewhere save. Looks like Anna is the only one who wasn't discovered.”

The others, having expected something like that, nodded slightly. Especially Nott seemed to be trying very hard to keep herself in check, and not show her anger around the little girl.

“How many people are we talking about?” Fjord asked, practical as always.

“Five. Her mother, her grandmother, and three older siblings,” Caleb told them. She hadn't mentioned a father, so he hadn't asked about one.

“That's a lot,” Fjord muttered, rubbing his chin for a moment. “Must have been a whole clan or something. We should be able to track that, right?” He looked around at the others, getting a few quick nods in response.

“If she could describe one of them, I could scry on them,” Jester offered. Her usually so bubbly nature had dimmed a bit under the circumstances, but she seemed all the more eager to help as she suggested that to Caleb, looking between him and Anna.

“I, uh, we can certainly try that,” Caleb agreed slowly. “I'm just afraid that the description of a five year old could be a bit vague. Maybe that should be more of a last resort?”

“You're just too lazy to translate,” Beau joked, but immediately got serious again. “No, I actually think you're right. And I'm sure we can start somewhere else. Like Fjord said, must have been a lot of goblins if they managed to drag five people with them. There are bound to be tracks of some sort here somewhere.”

“We should leave soon then, before we lose what little sunlight is left,” Yasha spoke. She'd been quiet so far, but the look in her eyes gave Caleb chills. “Nott, you should be able to help with this the most.”

“I'm staying here.”

Everyone turned to Nott in surprise, and not few of them confused. “But... this is pretty much exactly what happened to your family, too. Don't you want, I don't know, revenge?” Beau asked.

“Well, first of all, it wouldn't really be revenge, because this is a different clan than the one who took me and my family,” Nott insisted. “And second, someone clearly needs to stay behind with the girl, we can't just leave her alone again. And that someone is going to be Caleb, because he's the only one who understands her. So I'm going to stay here to protect Caleb in case they come back.”

Fjord huffed softly. “Not that I don't appreciate your protective instinct, but don't you think Caleb can defend himself? If anything comes?”

Nott just shrugged. “Maybe, but maybe not with a child hanging on to him at all times. Two people are better than one, so I'm staying.

“I would appreciate the help, actually,” Caleb told them. “She's right, I'm more vulnerable when I'm alone with her.” While he wasn't lying, he was mostly agreeing so the others would stop pressuring her into going with them. No matter her motive, he could understand if she wasn't in the mood to take on a clan of goblins after what they had done to her.

“Perfect, at least we will know you are save then,” Caduceus said with a smile. “Let's go. Just as Yasha has said, we do not want to waste anymore daylight.”

A last check on their weaponry, and then the five of them were on their way, Nott and Caleb staying behind with Anna. Once the others were gone and out of sight, Nott turned to her wizard friend. “What now? We can't really stand around here until they come back.”

“No, no I suppose not,” Caleb sighed. “I do not want to take her inside either though, not with the way it looks in there.”

“Stay here then, I will clean up a bit and you try to distract her,” Nott offered. But Caleb looked between her and Anna, seemingly becoming more and more uncomfortable.

“Distract her how? Nott, I've never- I'm not good with kids!” he whispered, desperately. “What am I supposed to do with her?”

“Just, you know, kids stuff,” she replied amused. “You were able to convince the Bright Queen to listen to you, I'm sure you'll be fine with a kid.”

“I'm not so sure about this,” he muttered.

Nott rolled her eyes and motioned Anna to come closer, giving her a warm smile. The girl looked at Caleb first, but then stepped closer to her.

“Caleb, ask her if she knows any games. Or what she likes to play with her siblings,” Nott said, only glancing at her friend briefly before focusing on Anna again.

Caleb looked confused but cleared his throat, addressing Anna directly. “Ah, meine Freundin hier möchte wissen ob es irgendwas gibt, was du gerne mit deinen Geschwistern spielst? Was für Spiele kennst du?”

Anna seemed to get what was going on, and with a slight smile she answered, looking more at Caleb than at Nott though. “Kennst du Klatschspiele?”

“She asks if you know any clapping games,” he relayed back to Nott.

“Well, do you?” she shot back. “Because she was very clearly not talking to me. Have fun.” And with that she gave a brief wave to Anna and left the two alone, Caleb barely suppressing a groan as she disappeared into the house.

Anna was still looking at him expectantly, so he walked over to a bench with her, in front of what looked like a stable, and they settled down there. “Okay, Klatschspiele. Ah, es ist etwas her, dass ich das gemacht habe, das musst du mir nachsehen.”

She just smiled widely and already grabbed for his hands, manipulating them until they were in the right position. Caleb couldn't help but compare it to teaching someone somatic figures, even if the thought was ridiculous. But the motions to the game came back easily to him, after all he had spend quite some time himself as a child playing this. The words did, too, to the incredibly silly game.

_Bei Müllers hat's gebrannt -brannt -brannt_  
_Da bin ich schnell gerannt -rannt -rannt_

Anna moved slowly, still very clearly leading the game for Caleb's sake. It shouldn't have been difficult, at least not for someone who regularly went through complicated sets of somatic gestures to save either himself or his friends, but Caleb found himself stumbling more often than not.

_Da kam ein Polizist -zist -zist_  
_Der schrieb mich auf die List List List_

The game was repetitive, to say the least, every line requiring the same set of movements. First, Caleb clapped his own hands together, then his right one against Anna's, then his own again, then his left hand against Anna's left. And every line ended with both meeting in the middle three times.

_Die Liste die fiel in Dreck Dreck Dreck_  
_Da war mein Name weg weg weg_  
_Da lief ich schnell nach Haus Haus Haus_  
_Zu meinem Onkel Klaus Klaus Klaus_

And at this point Caleb would have thought the game to be over, since these were all the lyrics he remembered. But Anna continued, her widening grin hinting at a glee that Caleb didn't quite understand yet. Until her lines got more and more absurd.

_Der Klaus der lag im Bett Bett Bett_  
_Mit seiner Frau Elisabeth_  
_Elisabeth die lachte_  
_Der Busenhalter krachte_

The girl was outright giggling at this point, barely getting through the lines. Caleb was surprised she'd even managed to get the word Busenhalter over her lips.

_Der Bauch der explodierte_  
_Ein Baby rausmarschierte_  
_Das Baby war ein Mädchen_  
_Und zeigte seine Zähnchen_

They finally finished, and Caleb gave her an amused look. “Das ist nicht unbedingt die Version die ich als Kind gelernt habe. Wer hat dir das beigebracht, huh?”

“Gregor,” she told him quietly, before laying a finger over her lips. “Aber nicht Mama sagen.”

He smiled back at her and zipped his mouth shut, sending her into another giggle fit. Just then, Nott came back outside, giving the two a fond look. “Seems like you were able to hold yourself after all.”

“Well, she sure knows some interesting words for a five year old,” Caleb joked. “But yes, I think we did okay. How's it looking inside?”

“Better. Come on, maybe we can find something to eat, too.”

Caleb agreed, relying their plans to Anna as she slowly calmed down again. Instead of walking inside by herself though, she insisted on being carried again. Caleb obliged.

“You know, if we're still looking to kill some time,” Nott offered, “I could teach her a few clapping games in Common, too.”

“But she won't understand them?”

“The words aren't too hard, and you can always tell her what it means,” she replied with a shrug. “It would be fun, come on.”

“Hmm. Anna, willst du Klatschspiele in Common lernen?” Caleb asked, and when he got an enthusiastic nod, he finally agreed with it as well.

“Great, I'll teach her “A half-orc went to sea”, first,” Nott said with a grin.

“Are you... are you sure that's how it goes?”

“Absolutely. Oh, and by the way, I'm not gonna tell anyone that you're a big softy if you agree to play with Luc the next time we're in Nicodranas.”

“Hmm. Deal,” he told her, thinking that was a very small price to pay for something he wouldn't have minded too much in the first place. But in order to keep it a secret, the others would first need to return anyway. Hopefully, with the rest of Anna's family in tow.

**Author's Note:**

> Translation for the clapping game. Kids games are weird ya'll: 
> 
> The miller's place burnt down, down, down,  
> Then I quickly ran away, way, way,  
> There came a policeman, man, man,  
> He put me on his list, list, list,  
> The list flew in the dirt, dirt, dirt,  
> My name was gone, gone, gone,  
> I quickly ran to my house, house, house,  
> To my uncle Claus, Claus, Claus,  
> Claus was lying in bed, bed, bed,  
> With his wife Elizabeth  
> Elizabeth laughed  
> Her bra cracked  
> Her belly exploded  
> A baby marched out  
> The baby was a girl  
> And showed her little teethies.
> 
> Pretty sure it's not necessary, but if anyone wants a video, you can find it here:  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ShlhMIIGl5M
> 
> The game Nott is referencing at the end, in case people don't know, is actually called "A Sailor Went to Sea" :)


End file.
